I Surrender My Secrets to You

I received the following Rumi poem from a friend –Kansas City poet Bob Savino. It turned out to be the best “Christmas poem” he picked for his friends, and became an inspiration for mine.

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“Bury your secret

            in the chamber of your heart

Your unknown desire will

burgeon.

            Drop the seeds to the

bowels of the earth,

            And the garden

            will spring beyond belief.” -Rumi

  ❦

Here are my secrets, for the bowels of the earth and of your eyes, drafted on a check envelope, one Christmas in Puerto Rico:

I surrender my secrets to You

Copyright ©2013 All rights reserved.

Can I spare my secret? No.

I love Her.

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Deep within the core of my atoms,

where subatomic particles

start to become nothing,

a subtle cloud of breath …

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Where the dream of that breath

hesitates to become … some sort of reality …

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There

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All Her lights approach me

like fairies

they salute,

giggle,

bow,

and … float …

A winged spiritual family,

and among them,

hughest than the stars

and the sky

that dreams about them–

  ❦

My Beloved.

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There I vanish and She comes to light.

A dance of Death and Life.

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Source of Mine,

wrap me around Your magic,

let Us dance in the Secret

of your whispering, commanding —

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“Heal!”

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You insisted. And I said yes.

90 days times 12

and you came back.

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“You’ve healed,” you confessed,

and I believed you.

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And it was true!

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Then I became Yours for the Glory

of the Love

I cannot see in the flesh

but burns in my Soul.

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That is my Secret.

Dear Lover of the Allness

My surrender, my Nothing

is the pedestal in which You

stand tall.

  ❦

And I embrace You,

And I say Yes

to disappearing

one heart-beat-at-a-time

As I approach

my last dwelling with You.

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Still going up the hill of my time here,

but the clock has always ticked backwards.

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And wait!

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Wait ‘till my breath

reaches the end,

don’t leave today!

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Because I expect,

because I KNOW

You will be waiting

where the sunset becomes

Purple.

I’ll finally be able

to say

“I love You,” to the sight

of Your last breath in me.

  ❦

I’m Yours, Cosmic Beloved.

  ❦

Not because You made me, I believe;

or because I become You

and Your Nothingness

every time I exhale.

  ❦

I love You

Just because I can.

  ❦

There is no because

beyond my knowing of You.

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Chased me through life

You have.

And I finally said no more races.

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I am Yours in this End/Beginning

that humans call

  ❦

Forever.

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And this poem is

incomplete

Without the mystery of

becoming

in the breath,

that becomes atoms,

that becomes Me.

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That is my Secret.

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Or should I say,

THERE

–in that no-place–

lies my Secret.

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There are no words

and It is beyond them.

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I can only live in awe

At what I can’t

verbalize.

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Because I decided to

stop

suffering.

  ❦

So now I only

LOVE.

  ❦

I hope.

   ❦

Perhaps.

  ❦

12/25/13

Copyright ©2013 All rights reserved.