the truth I Am

"Dragón de mar". Témpera sobre papel con la técnica de Pintura en Proceso @2013 por Samadhi Yaisha
“Sea dragon”. Tempura on paper with Painting for Process technique. @2013 by Samadhi Yaisha

©2013 all rights reserved

i am green

i am grass

i am a breeze

that I Am

i’m a poet

i can dance

i am thunder

i am black

my grandmother

told me I was

when my hair

got tangled up

and juvenile

hormones hit

a school girl

with wide hips

african and

latin traits

then curled up

i began

growing hair

when i heard

no you can’t

hair’s not curled

hair is straight

your black genes

won’t come out

your great-grandma

is now dead

she was white

no you can’t

realize

no you can’t

who you are

off I went

off I ran

to smooth out

stretch and rag

and reject

all my strands

no you can’t

no you can’t

be a curled

latin gal

so I buried

who I was

so I squelched

the blooming child

she got lost

i got sad

she died soon

i got mad

and forgot

who she was

so I ate

and I starved

couldn’t show

my true light

shortly after

hormones thumped

didn’t feel

I liked boys

was my truth

then my aunt

she came out

family growled

feuds and fights

all I heard

at school and house

like a swirl

of insane rants

no you can’t

no you can’t

be a lesbian

you’ll be gnarled

torn and twisted

that’s distorted

you’re so pretty

and so straight

don’t you see?

like your hair?

-the hair is FAKE!

no is not

you’re white and straight!

eighteen years

of false hair

eighteen years

of fake self

no wonder why

i was depressed

i hid and ate

my truth and blaze

years later

then I found

a place to hold

a group to talk

at least I felt

welcomed and loved

i did believe

that I belonged

until I heard

a backstage hum

the real belief

behind the play

addressed to those

who had come out

no you can’t

no you can’t

be a lesbian

that’s unbalanced

that is just

a human phase

but not your truth

you are no-self

and for that

you must be straight!

-but that’s a LIE!

not is not

no is not

you’re a straight

and balanced girl!

like the hair

like at home

like at school

and that job

they liked me white

they liked me straight

with the fake hair

and sugar lies

and building that

i ate and starved

not anymore

my truth is out

my inner fight

released tonight

with thunderstorms

and raging fires

my orange pen

shooting flowers

writes in defense

the latin girl

who got misled

by ignorance

by prejudice

by enmity

by racism

distorted lies

and let her know

that yes you can

oh yes you can

be curled and gay

latin and black

my truth is out

my heart now burns

aware I am

the fire melts

all fake all masks

the naked truth

is coming out

i’m naked, nude

open and raw

bare, exposed

undressed, disrobed

a healing truth

i’m green, i’m grass

i’m breeze, thunder

i love my mane

embrace my race…

…and I love rainbows…

@2013 all rights reserved

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